Friendship Habit — We Enjoy Each Other

Would say your spouse is your best friend? Have you had moments when your spouse felt more like your roommate than your best friend?

The truth is that every marriage swings between those two realities. Sometimes friendship feels natural and effortless. Other times, life becomes crowded with work, children, responsibilities, finances, and stress. When that happens, friendship often gets pushed into the background.

Many marriages don’t break apart. They simply become efficient. The bills get paid. The calendar stays organized—the household functions. But somewhere along the way, the couple stops enjoying each other.

One of the most important habits of a healthy marriage is intentionally creating opportunities to enjoy being together.

Friendship Is the Glue of a Better Together Marriage

Romance may spark a relationship, but friendship sustains it. A strong friendship creates trust, safety, affection, and enjoyment. It provides the foundation couples need to navigate conflict, stress, disappointment, and the changing seasons of life.

Marriage researcher John Gottman has spent decades studying healthy marriages. One of his most quoted conclusions is:

“Happy marriages are based on a deep friendship.”

That friendship is built over time through shared experiences, mutual respect, genuine interest in one another, and simply enjoying each other’s company. When friendship is strong, couples are better equipped to face challenges together. When friendship weakens, even small problems can feel much larger.

Fun Is Not Optional—It’s Relational Fuel

Many couples treat fun as a luxury.

“We’ll have fun when things slow down.”

“We’ll take time for each other after this busy season.”

“We’ll reconnect when the kids are older.”

The problem is that there is always another busy season.

Enjoyment and laughter are not extras in marriage. They are fuel for the relationship. Without moments of joy, marriage can slowly begin to feel like a responsibility rather than a relationship.

Think about your closest friendships. What makes them enjoyable? Chances are you laugh together, share experiences, enjoy common interests, and simply like being around each other.

Marriage needs those same ingredients. Couples who laugh together, play together, and enjoy one another’s company often find that emotional connection grows naturally.

Shared Experiences Create New Connection Points

One of the simplest ways to strengthen friendship in marriage is to create shared experiences.

When couples spend time doing things together, they create new memories and new points of connection. These experiences don’t have to be elaborate, expensive, or Instagram-worthy.

In fact, some of the most meaningful moments are surprisingly simple.

  • A walk around the neighborhood.
  • A cup of coffee on the back deck.
  • Playing a game together.
  • Exploring a new restaurant.
  • Taking a drive.
  • Working on a project side by side.

Shared experiences help restore closeness without forcing deep conversation. They create space for connection to grow naturally.

Simple Ways to Enjoy Each Other This Week

If friendship has drifted to the background, start small. Try one of these simple habits:

  • Schedule a weekly date. It doesn’t have to cost money. The goal is focused time together.
  • Do something you both enjoy, whether it’s walking, having coffee, playing a game, or pursuing a shared hobby.
  • Find opportunities to laugh together. Watch something funny, tell stories, or revisit favorite memories from earlier years.

Small moments of enjoyment often create significant deposits into the friendship side of marriage.

One Final Thought

Marriage is intended to be more than a well-managed partnership.

It’s a friendship.

The goal is not merely to live together, raise children together, or solve problems together. The goal is to genuinely enjoy being together. Because at the end of the day, one of the greatest gifts in marriage is being able to say: “I’m married to my best friend.”

“Let us not get tired of doing good, for we will reap at the proper time if we don’t give up.” — Galatians 6:9 (CSB)